Abortion Ban... Now!

I think one of the things I like best about the Supreme Court is its complete suddenness. I think I heard a year ago (or something) that a partial-birth abortion case was being taken to the Supreme Court. I think the law was passed in 2003? I didn't pay attention. Nobody paid attention except abortion bores.

And now, today, all of a sudden, they swoop down with news. Did anybody see this coming? I suppose someone did. I'm sure there are people who pay attention to the courts, and even "anticipate" news like this, but not me pal. With Congress, you can track the passage of a bill, day by day, until the president signs it, but even with the articles that begin "The Supreme Court heard arguments today about," it's hard to keep track of what's on its schedule. And those articles are boring. Quick, name a case pending before the court!

It's not like this isn't important, either. Every year the Supreme Court makes two or three decisions that are change more than anything Congress does all year. Lawrence v. Texas, Raich v. Gonzales, and this new decision (apparently unnamed until the Supremes can decide on something catchy) way outstrip the Bankruptcy Bill in both interest and important-ness. And even I know how the Bankruptcy Bill went down.

In this way, Supreme Court cases have the satisfying feel of a celebrity death, or an unprovoked war. Usually, you read the news in the morning and it's the same old "Many Die in Baghdad," or rehashing a national tragedy* long after I have lost interest, or something boring about money. When power players make news, well, it is like a little gift from them to me.

*Fun Fact! The newspaper descriptions of the Virginia Tech killer's social interactions remind me of myself. Watch out.

Plant Blindness

The New York Times offers a primer on plants. I know how it is. You're so caught up in your Ivy League, investment-banking life, learning about the classics and keeping track of P/E ratios, that, gosh, you forgot to learn about plants. Times to the rescue, telling you about plants in friendly language, that won't scare off the shyer amateur botanists...

"Plants essentially eat the sun."
"Essential though plants may be to our survival, Dr. Raven emphasizes that they are a radically different form of organism than are animals."
"A plant is also always drinking, slurping water and nutrients the only way it can, through its roots. "

... as well as the people who are completely bored by plants:

"Some people aren’t even sure that plants are alive."
"We barely notice plants, can rarely identify them and find them incomparably inert."

It's never too late to learn about plants! If you missed the plant lecture in class, or just want to brush up on your plant knowledge, give it a look.

Handicapper General

The late Kurt Vonnegut graded his own works. It's in here somewhere, scroll down, etc. I am not interested in the aspect of Vonnegut that wrote books. That part leaves me cold. But rather than place himself in history with his classroom-style grades, Vonnegut said he was comparing "myself with myself." Which makes sense, because Kurt Vonnegut reminds me of nobody more than my high-school chemistry teacher, who graded purely on a curve, and invariably gave out as many A's as F's.

It's bad for your test-writing style, and I think I can see the same influence on the late author's novels. After all, why bother to write a book , if the best it can do is push Breakfast of Champions across the curve? If nobody is going to compare you to Charles Dickens, and you're going to be "idiosyncratic" no matter what you do, all that's left is to decide whether you want to write an "A+" book or a "D" book.

In the end, Vonnegut seems to have chickened out. His personal reckoning contains 3 times as many A's as D's, and no F's, i.e. Kurt Vonnegut says his books are all pretty good. If it comes to that, I'm pretty sure my chemistry teacher just gave everyone a B+ at the end of the year. You might as well. When it comes to cheap gags, nobody who dies this week is going to beat Johnny Hart. If he and Kurt Vonnegut were graded together on a scale, well I certainly know who would be getting the pity B+.

Tell Me About the Rabbits

I return from my nearly three-week hiatus with... more robots! Even if the world's bloggers can't be counted on, at least our robot engineers will keep churning out conversation pieces into the next decade and beyond. In this case we have Infanoid and Keepon, the "childlike robot" and "creature-like robot," respectively. Whereas ASIMO is the publicity-stunt-like robot, or the money-pit-like robot, these fun fellows are the real deal.

Keepon has, as the technical literature describes it, a "yellow, snowman like body". He watches things -- and that's about it. Oh, and he also manages to express "pleasure and excitement" with nothing but his adorable blank gaze and a neck. You're no Lucille Ball, Keepon, but considering your circumstances, you do a good job.

Keepon, it seems, is a big hit. " Some of the children extended their diadic interaction with Keepon into triadic inter-personal interaction, where they tried to share the pleasure and surprise they found in Keepon with others," because "Keepon seemed to be neither a complex human nor a simple toy." The sweet spot indeed. They always told me I was a little autistic; why else could I long to share my pleasure and surprise with you, the reader?

Infanoid, meanwhile, isn't quite the everything-but-one-plegic that Keepon is, but a return to robot basics. He can't do any of that fancy walking that characterizes ASIMO, but he does a mean grasp-and-point. Like, "stay away from my bunny, dude." If you ever need a robot to guard your bunny or ball, pointing all the while, Infanoid is your man. I picture him talking like Don Knotts.

Infanoid also does 4 facial expressions, with a disturbing aura of blackface around them. Those red lips and googly eyes can't be racially sensitive, but let's not hold it against child-like, innocent Infanoid.

Apparently the whole point of this robot rumpus is to simulate child development, or some unnecessary rationale like that. It seems Keepon is the creature that children interact with, while Infanoid simulates the child himself. The pointy, grabby, child. My question is, have they ever put Infanoid and Keepon together? You always see one or the other in the photos, not both. Considering their separate personalities, I get the feeling they would really hit it off. In fact, I think it might be like Of Mice of Men. Keepon and Infanoid will live offa the fatta the lan'.