Sleep Schedules
I seem to recall reading (could it have been the New York Times??) that in pre-Industrial Europe, bedtime was just after dusk, and people got up at dawn. But they also got up in the middle of the night for a few hours, mostly because nobody can sleep for 12 - 18 hours straight. I forget what the Times said they did in this fun interlude, but it can't have been much. Probably picked fleas off themselves and went out to make sure the cow was still there (can't be too sure).
In these days of electric lights and cement trucks roaring outside your window at 4 AM, we are free to choose our own bedtimes. Let's compare some sample sleep periods. I'm going to assume everyone sleeps 8 hours a night. I have a hard time getting by with fewer than 10, and Andrew Card apparently only sleeps 4. But these are only estimates. Moreover, you can shift these a few hours in either directions. They're just sketches.
Usual. This is when you sleep from about 11 PM to 7 AM. This is what about 85 percent of the world does. It has its advantages, certainly. Since most jobs happen from 9 AM to 5 PM, it means you're always up for work, even if you have to hurry a little in the morning. Most parties happen, and TV shows are on, from 5 to 11 PM -- if only because most people keep this schedule in the first place -- so you have your pick of fun things to do. And if you're a farmer, or sundial inspector, this sleep schedule lets you be up all day.
It has powerful drawbacks though. For one thing, you need to get up in the morning. Of course you are always going to have to get up, but under this system you have to get up in the morning. I cannot put my finger on it, but there is something hateful about getting up in the morning. Possibly how cold and wet it is. Even worse, you have to get up just before your job. That means if you feel sick, or hungover, or just unusually drowsy, you have no choice about getting up.
Clubgoer. Clubgoers sleep from 7 AM to 3 PM. At least, I think that's what they like to do, right? When you sleep those hours, you can't hold a real job. That is why most people don't do it and why parents worry that their children might. But you can always work the night shift. Or be a bohemian artist who keeps his own hours. Or be unemployed. The fact that most unemployed people gravitate towards this suggests that it wil be the sleep schedule of the future. Unemployed people have always been at the vanguard of important trends, like Communism or obesity.
I guess this scheme appeals to teenagers and other young people because it allows you to go to the really cool parties. I guess those are either the ones where everyone drinks too much and vomits into concave things (the more you drink, the more marginally concave), or where everyone takes ecstasy and gets featured on Touched by an Angel. Then you can go to Denny's. (Have you noticed that they actually target ads to all-night partiers now? It bothers me, but I can't describe how.)
Bizarro. The bizarro schedule is the least popular way to divide up the day. I can't imagine why. It involves sleeping from about 3 PM to 11 PM. It has a definite advantage over the teenager system -- if you push it back a few hours (or get a slightly flexible job), you can lead a very normal professional life. To be sure, you can't participate in many after-hours social activities, but whose fault is that? Society's as much as yours. If you can get some friends to join you on the bizarro sleep cycle, you can form a misanthropic society and curse the sun.
And unlike the usual schedule, you don't have to get up just before work. If you feel like lolling in bed for another 6 hours, feel free. What else were you going to do with your time? You were just going to waste it playing FreeCell. If you are going to come face to face with the futility of your life, it's a lot less depressing to do it at sunrise, rather than sunset. Still, one unavoidable problem is that the stores close so early. You will have to do all of your errands either just before work or just before you go to bed, in which case you will be sleepy and forget to wait for your change.
There are probably other ways of sleeping. You can look at variants like 7 PM - 3 AM (baby), 3AM - 11 AM (teenager) and 11 AM - 7PM, (vampire) but there probably isn't much else to say. I think all sleep patterns basically fall into the three listed above. There are, of course, those people who don't sleep all at once. Wasn't Leonardo DaVinci one of them? Or was that just a Seinfeld episode. In any case, I'm not sure that works in the long run. You just aren't tired enough to go to sleep at the beginning of each "nap", and not well rested enough to wake up at the end. Eventually you will collapse into one of the above-mentioned patterns, unless you can't avoid it (e.g. you are working several jobs and have no choice, in which case no advice will do you any good).
In these days of electric lights and cement trucks roaring outside your window at 4 AM, we are free to choose our own bedtimes. Let's compare some sample sleep periods. I'm going to assume everyone sleeps 8 hours a night. I have a hard time getting by with fewer than 10, and Andrew Card apparently only sleeps 4. But these are only estimates. Moreover, you can shift these a few hours in either directions. They're just sketches.
Usual. This is when you sleep from about 11 PM to 7 AM. This is what about 85 percent of the world does. It has its advantages, certainly. Since most jobs happen from 9 AM to 5 PM, it means you're always up for work, even if you have to hurry a little in the morning. Most parties happen, and TV shows are on, from 5 to 11 PM -- if only because most people keep this schedule in the first place -- so you have your pick of fun things to do. And if you're a farmer, or sundial inspector, this sleep schedule lets you be up all day.
It has powerful drawbacks though. For one thing, you need to get up in the morning. Of course you are always going to have to get up, but under this system you have to get up in the morning. I cannot put my finger on it, but there is something hateful about getting up in the morning. Possibly how cold and wet it is. Even worse, you have to get up just before your job. That means if you feel sick, or hungover, or just unusually drowsy, you have no choice about getting up.
Clubgoer. Clubgoers sleep from 7 AM to 3 PM. At least, I think that's what they like to do, right? When you sleep those hours, you can't hold a real job. That is why most people don't do it and why parents worry that their children might. But you can always work the night shift. Or be a bohemian artist who keeps his own hours. Or be unemployed. The fact that most unemployed people gravitate towards this suggests that it wil be the sleep schedule of the future. Unemployed people have always been at the vanguard of important trends, like Communism or obesity.
I guess this scheme appeals to teenagers and other young people because it allows you to go to the really cool parties. I guess those are either the ones where everyone drinks too much and vomits into concave things (the more you drink, the more marginally concave), or where everyone takes ecstasy and gets featured on Touched by an Angel. Then you can go to Denny's. (Have you noticed that they actually target ads to all-night partiers now? It bothers me, but I can't describe how.)
Bizarro. The bizarro schedule is the least popular way to divide up the day. I can't imagine why. It involves sleeping from about 3 PM to 11 PM. It has a definite advantage over the teenager system -- if you push it back a few hours (or get a slightly flexible job), you can lead a very normal professional life. To be sure, you can't participate in many after-hours social activities, but whose fault is that? Society's as much as yours. If you can get some friends to join you on the bizarro sleep cycle, you can form a misanthropic society and curse the sun.
And unlike the usual schedule, you don't have to get up just before work. If you feel like lolling in bed for another 6 hours, feel free. What else were you going to do with your time? You were just going to waste it playing FreeCell. If you are going to come face to face with the futility of your life, it's a lot less depressing to do it at sunrise, rather than sunset. Still, one unavoidable problem is that the stores close so early. You will have to do all of your errands either just before work or just before you go to bed, in which case you will be sleepy and forget to wait for your change.
There are probably other ways of sleeping. You can look at variants like 7 PM - 3 AM (baby), 3AM - 11 AM (teenager) and 11 AM - 7PM, (vampire) but there probably isn't much else to say. I think all sleep patterns basically fall into the three listed above. There are, of course, those people who don't sleep all at once. Wasn't Leonardo DaVinci one of them? Or was that just a Seinfeld episode. In any case, I'm not sure that works in the long run. You just aren't tired enough to go to sleep at the beginning of each "nap", and not well rested enough to wake up at the end. Eventually you will collapse into one of the above-mentioned patterns, unless you can't avoid it (e.g. you are working several jobs and have no choice, in which case no advice will do you any good).
posted by apk01004 at 11:31 AM
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