YouTube

I remember when I saw my first YouTube thing. I call it a thing because I don't really know what it was.I guess one of those frames of a video that people put on their websites. I thought, "what the hell is that? It takes way longer to load than a normal picture and it's proportionately ugly." Or maybe I didn't think that. But if I had, I would have been prescient, because that is sure what I'm thinking now.

I don't mind people who want to watch videos on the internet. If computers appeal to only two of our senses, it's as immersive as you can get without the 3-D glasses. I have a hard time watching them myself, because I have the volume on everything turned up all the time (my records skew quiet) so video == din. Still, you know, do whatever you want. But when everyone plasters these frames all over their websites, it becomes my problem again. This is bad behavior in two ways.

First, as I said, YouTube frames take a very long time to load. I can only assume that some of that load time involves subjecting them to a welding torch, because the quality of the frames is terrible. It doesn't add anything to your website to have an ugly picture up front. If you want people to watch videos, send them to the YouTube homepage. I want to be able to scroll up and down a webpage and have an unimpeded and lovely view.

Second, if the point you are making cannot be encapsulated as "Here, look at this," don't think that it will help to offer me a YouTube frame. Since this company exploded in popularity (Was that May or April or something?) so many web page compositions have just been: YouTube frame & Clever title. Don't do it. You know who you are. At least tell me what the video is about. Give me something to go on. Because unless you are my best friend in the world, I'm not going to watch a video with zero context just because you told me to.

YouTube videos are a medium that requires some investment to watch. You can't just watch them and giggle at them and toss them back into the internet like a picture or prose and hope for the best. People (me?) have to recalibrate their computers and wait several minutes and everything. YouTube? Give me one reason why I shouldn't kill you right now.