Linnaeus Wept

Carolus Linnaeus had a nice idea. His idea was to classify the animals and plants of the world into kingdoms, phyla, classes, orders, families, genera, and species. Wasn't that a nice idea? Let's leave aside the fact that "phylum", "class", "family" and "genus" all mean basically the same thing. Let's leave aside the fact that his ordering of the terms was purely arbitrary and agree that he had a neat little system.

Over the years though, man have we gummed up his system. We have, by my count, subkingdoms, superphyla, divisions, subphyla, subdivisions, subclasses, suborders, subfamilies, tribes, subtribes, subregna, subspecies, varieties and cultivars. I am certain that I am missing some of these.

This is disgusting. It lowers us all to have to refer to creatures this way. If we can't coin all new terms, let's at least do away with the whole system. Use numbers, or hand signals or something. I don't think I can stand any more superclasses.