How to Make a Balloon Evil and Alive

First blow up a balloon, as full as you can get it. If you blow it up too full it will be evil, but no longer alive. Then set it aside for a few weeks. Try not to jostle it too much in that time. After it is mostly deflated, you can pick it up again. Spoo-ooky. The only conclusion? It is trying to kill you but lacks the strength. This is so much fun to do it is a shame it requires so much preparation.